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Patrick Stables

Patrick Stables

Writer

Satire News

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Join date: Feb 19, 2026

Posts (4)

May 24, 20262 min
Te Pāti Māori Party fractures as new Te Tai Tokerau Party is announced, multiple parties follow suit
Just last week, Te Tai Tokerau MP Mariameno Kapa-Kingi announced her split from Te Pāti Māori and subsequently the creation of a new political party, named after her electorate. Speaking to RNZ she said, “This is about restoring balance, strong local representation, and sending a clear signal that Tai Tokerau political power will no longer be taken for granted.” She said she hoped other candidates would do the same to “promote truly local decision-making and restore power to the people.” The...

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May 24, 20262 min
Salient News Writer Ryan Cleland, Announces Departure From Magazine Following Dispute With Co-Worker Martha Schenk
It was a dramatic afternoon in the offices of the student magazine Salient, as staff gathered for the final news meeting of the trimester. What was expected to be a routine wrap-up quickly turned tense after senior news writer Ryan Cleland announced his departure from the publication following an alleged disagreement with co-worker Martha Schenk. According to several students present at the meeting, discussions became increasingly heated while the news team debated coverage priorities for the...

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Mar 1, 20264 min
Satire: Chris Hipkins Unveils “I’m Not a Bad Guy” Campaign Ahead of 2026 Election Season
Labour pivots from inspiration to reassurance In a press conference lit exclusively by harsh, overhead fluorescents—the sort of lighting normally reserved for supermarket meat departments, police interviews, and situations where someone insists they don’t recall a conversation—Labour leader Chris Hipkins today unveiled what advisers are calling a reframing strategy for the party’s fortunes: the “ I’m Not a Bad Guy ” campaign. Reporters confirmed the lighting choice was deliberate. According...

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